Hands Off My Marmite

“Unknown suspect broke into local store and nicked all the marmite,” Anthony read aloud at the breakfast table. “Who would do a thing like that?”

“Ohh, if they did that to me, they’d have to be a nutter!” Harry said, setting down a plate of warm buttered toast.

“Yeah.” Anthony chuckled. “You’d have to be a nutter to nick marmite.”

“What you mean?”

“That stuff’s nasty! I’d rather eat jellied eels or lick a sidewalk before I ate that!”

“Marmite is some fine nosh! Better than that rubbish you eat in America!”

“Ha! Hardly”

“You take that back!”

“No! Marmite is nasty, foul, and you only like it because you love your beer!”

“Well, I do that. But you guys eat peanut butter and jelly! Gross!”

“Hey now, don’t knock it until you try it. At least it’s not made from yeast extract!”

“Or what about that bowl of grits you made me try! What kind of nosh was that?”

Anthony laughed. “Yeah, grits are gross. Pass the marmite, mate.”

This was inspired by the Three Things Challenge prompts: nicked, nutter, nosh

For those readers, who may need a little dictionary for this one:
nicked = stole
nutter = crazy person
nosh = food
marmite = A sticky, dark brown food paste made from yeast extract.



9 thoughts on “Hands Off My Marmite

  1. Did you write a post and then take it down? Something about someone commenting that you were a bad person for having your son as a single mother (or something like that)? I started reading it, got distracted by, well, by life, and figured I’d finish reading it later when I had time, but now I can’t find it. Am I just missing it? If so, can you respond with the link to that post do I can finish it? Thanks.

    Liked by 1 person

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