The Bull-headed Booby
Walter, James, and Evan grew up together in Smith’s Grove, Kentucky, and spent all their high school days making sure that they would be accepted into UC San Diego. After Walter and Even spoke about their plan and how hard they all worked to bring up James’ grades and academic skills, the admission representatives decided the trio would be a good fit for their school. It was a dream come true. They left the cold winters of Kentucky behind for the warm sun and beautiful ladies of southern California. After four years of college, the trio decided to go into business for themselves. Evan found a bar down by the beach that was for sale and they set about living the life they always saw in the movies.
“This place is a dump!” Walter said, seeing the Booby Bar for the first time.
“When you said booby bar,” James said, “this is not what I imagined.”
The bar hadn’t been in operation for nearly a decade and the boobies had taken over the entire outdoor seating area.
“Come on, it’s perfect!” Evan said. “It’s just going to take a little cleaning.”
Their life savings and two parental loans were sunk into the bar, so they had no choice. It took working from sunup to sundown for a month to whip the place into shape, but they managed to do it. With the exception of the boobies. No one knew how to deal with them. Everyone they asked just laughed at them. The Internet said that boobies like humans and will just hang out. They hoped that all the noise and shuffling about during the grand opening would shoo them away, but James wasn’t too sure.
“We’ve had workmen here all month and they didn’t leave,” James said while prepping for the grand opening.
“Shoo!” Walter yelled as a blue-footed booby hopped on the bar and stole a hot dog.
Suddenly thirty boobies were hopping on the bar trying to steal food, toothpicks, and basically anything not attached to the bar.
“These are some crazy birds,” Evan said. “I figured they would have headed to the Galapagos by now.”
“Not this group,” a man said, walking up to the bar from the beach.
“Sorry, sir. We’re closed,” Walter said.
“Ah, just wanted to come up and see what you did with the old place,” the man said. “I had such high hopes for it.”
“High hopes?” Evan asked. “You used to work here?”
The man laughed and shook his head. “Nah, I used to own the place. Until these bull-headed boobies moved in. They robbed me blind. Scared away all my customers. There’s more now I see.”
And with that the man shook his head and walked back out onto the beach and down toward the pier.
“Weird,” Evan said. “We bought this from the bank.”
“Someone else had to have owned it first, though,” Walter said.
“You don’t think he was right about these stupid birds, do you?” James asked.
It only took three hours after the grand opening to know he was. Customers fled as the boobies took over the bar for the night. The trio was devastated. This business venture had to work. They had to make it work somehow.
“I got an idea,” Walter said.
He worked all week moving things around, printing off new fliers, and the following weekend they opened as the Booby Interaction Center and had every young male in the area interested just because of the name. For five dollars, customers could buy a small cup of fish and feed the birds while drinking. It took three to four cups of fish to keep the booby from stealing off the customer’s plate, so the trio made a killing during its second grand opening. Three years later, it’s the hottest nightspot on the beach.